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Learn How to Embrace Your Inner Critic and Build Self-Compassion with ACT.

by | Aug 15, 2025 | Uncategorized

Do you ever hear a nagging voice in your head? The one that says you’re not good enough, smart enough, or just plain not enough? That voice is your inner critic, and while it might feel like your enemy, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) offers a powerful way to transform your relationship with it. Instead of trying to silence or fight your inner critic, what if you could embrace it, while establishing strong self-compassion? Together we will explore how ACT for self-esteem and healing your inner critic healing can help you shift from self-judgement to self-kindness. 

Understanding Your Inner Critic

Your inner critic is often shaped by early life experiences, cultural messages, and deep-rooted beliefs about success, worth, and failure. While it may have developed as a protective mechanism, over time it can erode your confidence and self-esteem. While self-criticism is likely common, it is also a destructive stressor. Research has found that individuals that struggle with high self-criticism, are more likely to experience depression, perfectionism, imposter syndrome, PTSD, and a variety of anxiety disorders (Andersone, 2023). Traditional approaches often focus on “positive thinking” to drown out negative self-talk. However, this can sometimes lead to suppressing or avoiding uncomfortable thoughts rather than addressing them. This is where Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) comes in.

What is ACT and How can it Help?

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is a third-way cognitive behavioural approach that focuses on helping you accept difficult thoughts and feelings, rather than trying to eliminate them. The goal is not to “get rid” of the inner critic, but to change how you relate to it. ACT teaches psychological flexibility, by allowing you to notice your thoughts without being dominated by them and acting in alignment with your values. Research supports the understanding that ACT is effective with clients wanting to work on their self-compassion and self-esteem (Yadavia et al., 2015). 

Embracing the Inner Critic with ACT

Let’s explore three ways ACT can help you start with healing your relationship with your inner critic. 

Cognitive Defusion

Research indicates that 80% of our thoughts we experience, may be negative (Cognitive Defusion Techniques and Exercises, 2022). Your inner critic may think “I’m unlovable”, “I am not good enough”, or “I will never succeed”. However, with using ACT and incorporating defusion, it allows for more flexibility about the uncomfortable thoughts and eventually hearing it as a thought instead of the absolute truth. By doing so, it encourages objectivity towards your thoughts, empowering individuals to have more openness and adaptability with their mental processes. There are different cognitive defusion exercises that can be incorporated into practice. For example, notice it, slow it down, sing it and thank your mind – just to name a few. 

Acceptance Instead of Avoidance

ACT encourages acceptance for uncomfortable emotions and thoughts rather than trying to push them away (Acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) techniques to facilitate personal growth, 2024). It can be challenging to live life fully when your mind is full of thoughts and feelings. When you resist your inner critic, it can sometimes amplify it. But when you turn towards it with curiosity, it ultimately reduces its power. This is the foundational piece of acceptance therapy. A common example would be feeling angry towards someone in your life and choosing to bottle up the anger. Over time, you will begin to distance yourself from this person. 

Commitment to Values-Based Action

When your inner critic is loud, it can keep you from pursuing what matters. ACT helps you get clear on your values. Values could look like growth, connections, creativity, and by taking committed action toward them while experiencing self-doubt. To help identify core values, ACT commonly used technique is the “80th birthday speech” (Exploring values-based actions in ACT therapy, 2024). By identifying your personal values it supports clients in making decisions and aligning their life towards what truly matters to them and what would lead to fulfilling wellbeing. Some of the key areas to consider are; family, career, health, romantic relationships, and friendships (Exploring values-based actions in ACT therapy, 2024). Ultimately leading to increased confidence and authentic self-worth over time. 

Building Self-Compassion Through ACT

Self-compassion is the antidote to self-criticism. It does not mean ignoring your flaws or indulging in self-pity, it means meeting yourself with kindness during those difficult moments of failure or struggle. Using ACT for self-esteem, you learn the following key techniques: speaking to yourself like you would a close friend, by holding your pain with mindful awareness rather than judgement, and accept your imperfections as part of the human experience. When you respond to your inner critic with compassion instead of resistance, you begin the process of inner critic healing.

To Conclude

Incorporating self-compassion and ACT, you can learn to sit with that voice, understand the origins, and choose not to let it steer your life. By combining acceptance, mindfulness, and committed action, ACT helps you step into a more compassionate, empowered version of yourself. It is not about silencing the inner critic, but turning down the volume and tuning into your values. 

How can Journey Psychology Help You?

At Journey Psychology, we understand the complexity of embracing your inner critic. We are committed to supporting you on your journey. That is why our team uses advanced and evidence-based approaches when creating a safe, compassionate, and professional space. Our experienced therapists will work with you to design a unique client-centered approach, while incorporating ACT techniques and a variety of other techniques. If you are ready to begin your healing journey, Journey Psychology is here to help. Please contact us to learn more about how we can support you and connect you with a therapist using Acceptance Commitment Therapy. 

 

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